Empathetic Welcome Mat

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Demi Slyt, Opinion Editor

Is there such a thing as being too nice? Absolutely. People often develop a self-destructive habit of constantly putting others feelings and happiness before their own; usually out of fear of someone not liking them or losing the people who do. Another factor could be that you act so nicely because you were raised to or have had past experiences with emotional abuse that still impact you today. Emotional abuse does exist and can affect a person in various ways. Sometimes making a person try to shelter themselves from further pain or try to stop people from leaving by catering to their every whim to please them. 

Is being too nice a bad thing? There are many cons that occur when you go down a route such as this. You could be taken advantage of or even unknowingly be abused in the process. From my own personal experience, you essentially become a welcome mat for dirtbags who will try to manipulate you or emotionally abuse you and because you are so kind-hearted you might try to deny it. Another thing that’s bad about being too nice is that you aren’t always respected or supported in the same ways you do other people. There’s also a large lack of self-care when you’re always putting others first. You aren’t thinking of the effect this has on your mental health, you’re probably bottling up your feelings to spare others the burden, you aren’t sleeping right to constantly give support, you sometimes aren’t eating right and you definitely aren’t getting enough support yourself. I found an article online that explains each of these in more depth. You can find it by following this link: https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/9309/being-too-nice/ 

Now, this isn’t discouraging being nice, because I feel that we do need more strong, good-hearted people in the world. This is just making people aware that being too nice doesn’t always have the greatest outcome. It’s okay to put yourself first! It isn’t selfish or wrong to take care of yourself the way you care for other people. You aren’t being mean by standing up for yourself. Over time I have learned that you need to be assertive, even if it doesn’t feel good because you think you may be hurting someone, you need to do what’s best for you. You deserve better than to be used, and you deserve more respect; You have more self-respect. Remember that.