BLOG: Moist

If you’re looking for a way to turn someone from a reasonable adult into a whiny, squeamish baby within seconds, try dropping the word “moist” into your conversation. Ugh, even typing the word makes me shudder.

I have no clue why the word disgusts me so much, but I am not alone on this one.

An article from the Huffington Post asked its readers to pick a word to be eliminated from the dictionary, and “moist’ was in the top three words on that list- for no apparent reason.

In my mind, the very act of saying it is kind of like making yourself gag. While I have zero idea of why I have such a strong detest and repulse of the word, I do have some alternatives that thousands of other people and I would greatly appreciate being used instead.

Most commonly it is used to describe cakes and cookies. However, the word “moist” originates from the old French word “moiste,” which literally means damp. Since when is damp synonymous with delicious? How about we use these words instead…

1.) Not Dry

I understand the downfalls of using “not dry” in place of “moist,” but I am willing to get excited about a not-dry cupcake as long as it’s not moist.

2.) Hydrated

Sure, “hydrated” makes me think of hangovers and marathons (in both situations, being hydrated is key) but a hydrated piece of cake sounds interesting enough to make me want to try it. Come on, you know you want a piece of hydrated cake.

3.) Spongy

“Spongy” is already used to describe great cakes. So use this adjective instead of the m-word for the sake of everyone’s gag reflexes.

4.) Divine

A moist piece of cake would be divine if it weren’t for the word “moist.” So channel your inner Southern grandmother and say, “Sugar, that cupcake is simply divine.”  I think this one, no matter how out-dated, may be the best candidate to replace “moist.”