Are the new releases a no, go or just so-so?

Deadpool: Go

Marvel’s latest movie, “Deadpool,” is a love story about Wade Wilson, a hitman who finds the girl of his dreams and seems to have it all… until he finds out he’s dying of cancer. Out of desperation, Wade agrees to undergo experimental treatments by a sadistic doctor. These treatments cure his cancer and give him super-strength and invincibility. The only downside is that he’s now hideously disfigured and is too ashamed to go home to his fiancée.

“Deadpool” is a comedy. Wade becomes known as the mercenary with a mouth, speaking to the audience as if he knows they’re watching him. With his constant gags and one-liners you would never think that the anti-hero is hiding a painful past. He lives with a blind woman and argues with her over Ikea furniture.

“Deadpool” is also an action movie. A duo of X-Men pursue Deadpool to encourage him to join them and be a hero; too bad Wade is having none of it. All he wants is to kill the man who ruined his life.

There’s something in this movie for everyone, unless you don’t like gore or foul language. But as Deadpool says, “I’m not in a superhero movie, I’m just a bad guy who kills badder guys.”

Zoolander 2: No

I loved the first Zoolander movie. I can still quote most of it after it won me over with its goofy and absurdist comedy nearly 15 years ago.

That’s why it pains me so much to say that “Zoolander 2” is bad; it’s stupid but without the charm and subtle wit that made the first movie work. “Zoolander 2” is stupid in the way an Adam Sandler movie is stupid (if you like Adam Sandler’s newer movies I question how you made it into college).

This movie was my most anticipated movie of 2016 (I question how I made it into college). The story sounded perfect for this type of sequel: Derek Zoolander and his BFF Hansel are recruited to help solve a string of murders where the victims died while imitating Derek’s signature modeling pose: Blue Steel. As this is happening the evil fashion designer Mugatu is released from prison and sets out to get revenge on Zoolander for sending him to jail in the first movie.

The attempts at humor in this movie are just throwing a ton of celebrity cameos in your face and repeating lines from the original. Despite having the tools to make a decent follow-up, “Zoolander 2” is about as funny as someone breaking into your house to fart in your face while you sleep.

Alisabeth Otto is a staff writer for The Dakota Student. She can be reached at [email protected]