Trying to stay current with the times and to keep such a ‘beautiful’ story alive, I asked the comedians for their take on the Justin Bieber D.U.I incident in late January.

Comics have a great way of getting you to laugh, but leaving you with a underscoring message. SNL’s Weekend Update, The Colbert Report, and The Daily Show John Stewart are just a few examples of satirical news that tend to hit the heart and the brain, and get the job done.

PK: This is a totally random question, but how do you feel about the recent Justin Bieber incident?

AA: “I think it’s…AWESOME! Because of the jokes flying back and forth.”

OB: “I think he and Miley Cyrus are the same person. It’s crazy.”

AA: “I feel like he set himself up for that. You can’t be driving down a busy street in Miami, drunk, in a screaming loud, yellow lamborghini (clearly he was very frustrated with Justin’s stupidity). It’s like you’re just asking for trouble.”

OB: “I feel bad for that kid, man. He’s done.”

AA: “I don’t feel bad.”

PK: I think he just feels entitled to this life of fame.

OB: “It’s just going to be nuts. When every little thing you do is analyzed like that… I mean it’s cool if you get famous after 25, I think you’re life’s a lot more fun than if you’re famous at 16. He can’t just be a kid and he’ll never get that back.”

PK: That’s not general kid behavior, that I’m aware of.

OB: “No. A D.U.I. under 21? That’s a felony.

AA: “And he’s a foreigner.”

OB: “I know a lot of Mexican’s right now like, ‘Why isn’t that dude getting deported?’.

PK: It’s the fame.

OB: “If you can sing and dance, you can get away with a lot of s**t.”

PK: Or you could have a posse of teen girls who support you.

OB: “But I feel like that would get exhausting. Like everywhere you go, just women want to have sex with you.”

AA: “Well hold on there a second now.”

OB: “Looking at it on that level, like it must be exhausting.”

It’s never really an easy life for anyone in the public eye, let alone child stars. While the list continues to grow with ‘downward spirals’ and ‘lost careers’, there are always child and teen stars who make it through just fine (i.e. Hilary Duff or the Jonas Brothers), or struggle and come back stronger (i.e Demi Lovato).
It’s a tough business and a relatively personal, uncharted world. We can only watch from the outside and criticize with the best of our knowledge. Is there anyway to help them – should we help them? Now that, that could be a discussion on it’s own.

Paula Kaledzi is a staff writer for The Dakota Student. She can be reached at [email protected].