I recently made a (in my opinion) fantastic Facebook status:

“The Freshman 15 is real. I am on 5. The gym is real too…real far away…”

32 likes and nine comments later – I am still reeling in laughter over how brilliant I am with the truth.

The truth is, the Freshman 15 (on gaining or losing) is real. The truth is I have gained five of the 15. In some relative truth, the gym is ‘far’ away. The truth is the Freshman 15 sucks.

You have this idea that you’ll get to college, balance your hectic, yet fun life with a newly learned finesse, and come back home for winter break *glowing* with experience.

Gaining 15 pounds is none of the above and hinders that well-imagined image I’ve cultivated for myself.

The Freshman 15 makes me feel like I never left high school. There’s this constant feeling that you look awful in your clothes, people are judging you, and your mom keeps asking you if you’ve lost any weight.

I assumed getting older meant  I would be more confident about my body and that I understood it- it would be the least of my worries and I’d have it under control. Gaining weight is almost never on purpose, let alone 15 pounds in 8 months.

The Freshman 15 is this roadblock to the new outward and inward me.

If I can’t control myself in the face of Pasta Night, how will I be able to function elsewhere?

Obviously those 32 likes and 9 comments (they’re my claim to fame so let me brag) we’re not only commending my growing comedic skills, but they were sympathetic and full of understanding. My other freshman friends and those who have gone through it are probably feeling the way I do. And it makes this whole mess a little better.

If anything, the Freshman 15 may be the thing that sets me on a path for control. If not, there’s more of me to hug.