Cuffing Season

The need for connection

Courtesy+of+Unsplash

Courtesy of Unsplash

Demetria Slyt, Opinion Writer

What’s with all of this hype around cuffing season? More importantly, what is cuffing season exactly? For those of you who aren’t aware, “cuffing season” refers to a time of year, mostly winter months, where single people are most likely seeking out relationships. This phenomenon is said to take place between October until March. It’s said that in the winter months, there is a greater chance of getting into a relationship, whether that relationship is short term or long term. The psychology behind it is simply because of the cold weather there are more opportunities to stay indoors to canoodle with another person for warmth. The term “cuffing” itself has a similar meaning to the ol’ ball-and-chain trope around marriage, which is usually used in a somewhat negative way. The unfortunate thing is that some of these relationships are only temporary, and due to lack of communication, people get hurt. There are a handful of other reasons it really isn’t worth the hype or effort either.  

 It’s easy to get wrapped up in all of the excitement of “cuffing season.” You may feel pressure to find somebody or make a connection. This pressure could be from talk of the season itself, or it could unintentionally come from seeing the surge of couples everywhere you look. I think It’s especially hard If you’ve just gotten out of a relationship. You may find yourself vulnerable and feel as though you need someone else to fill that void. You kind of lose sight of yourself a little bit, and all this pressure to find someone else or find someone better can really build up. Then there’s also the pressure and anxiety of not finding anyone or thinking things like you’ll be alone forever, or no one could love you. It can really eat a person up. 

Another thing that’s an issue with cuffing season is the idea that you have to “settle” for whoever you first meet or settle in general, so you don’t end up alone by the end of the season. I personally think that the whole idea is absolute bunk and that no one should ever just settle because they don’t want to end up alone. You should always put your well-being first and make sure you choose the right partner for you. What if you “settle” with the first person you meet and they’re abusive, or they turn out to be a sociopath? It’s incredibly hard to get out of relationships like that. That’s why you or anyone else has every right to be as “picky” as they want. I’ve found it’s also important to not rush things and take as much time as you can in a new relationship or courtship. I feel like cuffing season really provokes people to rush into relationships without a lot of foresight. That can be the downfall in a number of relationships. 

The fact of the matter is, you don’t need a relationship to be happy or feel valued. Your happiness and well-being should not rely on others. I realize that isn’t always an easy mindset to have but it is true and more people should understand that. It may be especially hard to comprehend if you’ve experienced nothing but very codependent relationships in the past. Codependent relationships are extremely unhealthy because you shouldn’t let someone have full control over your life and happiness. There is also a high chance a codependent relationship can turn into or escalate into emotional abuse. If you’d like to learn more about that topic, you can check out my previous article about emotional abuse here:https://dakotastudent.com/14179/opinion/emotional-abuse-is-abuse/ 

Cuffing season isn’t worth all the hype or anxiety, given the handful of issues, there are with it. However, If you do happen to partake in whatever the season brings I wish you the best and hope you’re all staying safe. What are your thoughts on cuffing season? Do you think it’s worth the hype? Do you think it’s good to be “picky” with new partners? As always, feel free to reach out via email with any comments you may have pertaining to today’s article or even just feedback about what I could have covered better. I enjoy hearing back from readers with their own opinions or personal thoughts. Stay tuned for new articles every Monday and Friday, and stay safe out there! 

 

Demetria Slyt is a Dakota Student Opinion Writer. She can be reached at [email protected]