In my many travels as a dashing super spy who traveled the world fighting crime (or a family vacation, whatever you want to call it), I went to London and Paris and had many great adventures there.

These are a few of the entertaining tales of this journey, accompanied by pictures I took while there.

So, there I was in a museum in London, drinking in all the culture that one could ever hope to experience in a lifetime and I was bored. Shocking I know, after all, looking at really old stuff is always exciting for everybody. Fortunately, I was not alone. My sister was also there and was also bored. These were the days before Instagram and Twitter–all the way back in 2009–and before everyone had a camera on their phone, or at least a good one. If you wanted to take silly pictures and share them with friends, you had to do it the old-fashioned way, by using a point-and-shoot camera and waiting until you got home to upload them to Facebook because overseas charges for internet were insanely high.

My sister and I were both bored to a dangerous degree, so to deal with our boredom, we began taking pictures in which we would imitate the poses of various statues in an attempt to inject some humor and life into a lifeless collection of ancient history. Not that history isn’t interesting of course. I think the minutia of who slaughtered who for what reason is extremely fascinating and I eagerly await every opportunity to hear more tales of carnage and death. I may have gotten a little sidetracked, but the point is making fun of ancient art is more fun than looking at ancient art, at least for a slightly hyperactive 15 year old and his amazing sister.