Ah, Facebook: The Internet’s way of keeping tabs on the people you don’t like without them knowing. I am incredibly guilty of this, and I am sure you are, too.

Now, just because I have you as a Facebook friend doesn’t mean I dislike you. Most of the people I have on my friends list are people I either genuinely care about or have good reason to keep in contact with. The others, well, not so much.

I have had the pleasure of knowing some pretty big jerks — and I’m sure there are those who would say the same about me. Every now and then, that nasty, mean part of me that I usually keep under control likes to troll my Facebook feed and laugh at said jerks. I am not proud of this, but it’s the honest truth.

I don’t laugh at things that are major tragedies in a person’s life, such as a cancer diagnosis. Some things I will never wish on my worst enemy.This is, and always will be, a line that humor should not cross. Laughing at other’s real tragedies would be not only disregarding that line, but taking a flying leap over it.

But as for the person bragging about how they never do any work on the job who subsequently gets fired, well, I can’t deny that gives me the giggles.

Though I must admit that letting my Internet-Hyde out of my day-to-day Jekyll is nice, there are lines I will never cross.

Bullying, even on the internet, is a real problem — one that I refuse to contribute to — I may laugh at your incorrect use of “you’re,” but I would never ever patronize you for it. My mirth is the same as laughing in church. I keep it down, and I keep it to myself.

Yes, this may paint me as morally ambiguous at best, and morally reprehensible at worst, but watching the people who treated me like scum at some point in my life receive their retribution? There is absolutely a pleasure in that, as twisted as it may be.

I guess my whole point here is that we all do it. We shouldn’t be ashamed of this. So long as we are not acting on any of our thoughts — for example, publicly mocking a person for a self-inflicted misfortune — there isn’t any harm. After all, websites like Failblog.com wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for this mildly perverse pleasure. It’s time we own up to it.

This doesn’t make us bad people. Were any of these friends I mock in my head to call me up needing a hand with a flat tire or a shoulder to sob on, I’d be happy to help.

I do not do this because I devalue their humanity. On the contrary, my internal bully is simply happy to be reminded these people who’ve been so awful to me are still human. They still have bad days, they still have feelings. It doesn’t, at the end of the day, matter how they treated me. They still deserve all the help I would give to a real-life friend.

These people I internally laugh at were the people who bullied me. For me to actually say what goes through my mind, to publicly revel in and further their humiliation, would bring me down to their level. Having been the receiver of the bullying, I never want to do that to a person. I know how it feels, and I will never subject another human to it.

The fact of the matter is, we’re all human. We all occasionally laugh when someone falls over. This doesn’t make us bad people. However, not stopping to help that person colors you as a human, laughing or no.

As cliche as it may be, actions do speak louder than words. The same goes for online activity.

Kjerstine Tooien is a staff writer for The Dakota Student. She can be reached at [email protected]