On a regular basis, we receive advice or give advice to many different people in our lives. But how often do you take your own advice and work towards solving your own problems? It is common practice to give advice in light of friends’ or families’ problems, only to look elsewhere for a solution to a similar issue we are facing. It is easy to take advice from others because we are seeking empathy, validation, or looking for real solutions. It is difficult to take our own advice because we are often too close to the situation or issue to think of real solutions. How can you get out of your own head? And how can you start really taking your own advice?  

The biggest step in taking your own advice is giving yourself more credit. We are all so much smarter than we realize. Do you feel like people come to you for advice regularly? If the answer is yes there is probably a reason for that. Trust is a big part of opening up to people and looking for help when you need it. That is why it is so important to have more trust in your own capabilities.  

The next step forward is to take a step back. It helps to sit down and look at your problems from a different angle or even from someone else’s perspective. It is also helpful to really pay attention to the things that you are doing. For example, if you advise against doing something you shouldn’t then why would you do it yourself? If you hear a little voice in the back of your head, you should listen to it. I often hear that little voice when I do something I know isn’t okay, like beating myself up about something I can’t change or watching an episode of a series without my partner. 

Another easy way of thinking about taking your own advice is to imagine that you are giving it to someone else. What would you tell a friend or family member if they came to you with the same exact issue? Think about what the problem you are dealing with really is, and ask yourself the big questions that may help guide you to your own answers. Are you thinking of ending a relationship? Or starting one? Ask yourself why you want that or why you don’t want that.  

Have patience with yourself. Take your own advice with compassion, much like you would give it to others. Work on forming a better relationship with yourself and learn to trust that you are capable of more than you know. Take a step back if you need to and breathe, because the solution to the problems you are facing might be right at the tip of your tongue.  

Demetria Skyt is a Dakota Student General Reporter. She can be reached at [email protected].